A letter to ME in 2009
I planned to blog about my IELTS test on 31st March actually, yet, I found an old pendrive and then viewed each folder again.
One thing brought me back to the past... It is the photo folder of my ex.
Well, to be frank, I did not feel down or upset. However, it did make me think of how unexpected life could be. When I was with him, he was such a caring boy who made me feel like I am the luckiest girl. I had faced many emotional attacks from some people when I was with him, though most of them were false accusation. I had never did anything to "intrude" one's relationship, I had never done things to hurt her too. Those words, I chose not to listen and believed that things will be alright when time passes. Turn out, they did switch their topic for gossiping and I was safe for the moment. I just knew, I had done so many things for him, I used to have the passion to cook, bake, D.I.Y and so on. Woa.. I am kinda impressed by the photos. Couldn't believe I am such a talented girl. XD.
By the way, until now, I still do not understand how did he change so quickly. I checked the date of the photos, it was so close to the date he broke up. 19th Dec. I did not sense anything at all. Or maybe I did. I do not know really. But then, the S's group are right. (S's group is the name I gave to my old BBF's) We did not know each other enough before we started. Right, fot the 9 months, we were so sweet than not even one quarrels appear. Yet, ended up, he lost passion and leave. Our relationship was not built with a strong base. Lah! I do not know what I am trying to say. I just felt, love is never fair, it doesn't value how much you have given or how much you have sacrificed.
Now that I do not feel down about his leaving, I am able to understand what S's group said, we are not suitable for each other. He is the type of guy that love the kind of life I will not even think of trying. I love the things he doesn't like and vice versa. True, we changed for each other but it did not work out the right way sometimes. I still remembered the reason i got attracted to him is his playful nature, but in the end, I got sick, or maybe fed up by his not-serious attitude. Hah. Funny, how it goes. And, dear ME, he did not owe me anything either. During our relationship, he was giving me his best. And honestly, because of him, I gained some friendships which means so much to me now.
Again, I do not understand how God has made this happen.. I met a guy with the same name and turn out becoming someone important to me. I believe I have taken long enough to consider my decision but still, I did not know him more than I knew the one with you in 2009. By the way, God has made a perfect plan for us, and we survived many solved or unsolved problemss, and had just celebrated out 2nd Valentine's Day two months ago. Though there are some down moments, yet, in all, we enjoyed our life. It is definitely not as interesting and adventurous as you had experienced, however, admittedly, I prefer this stable ordinary relationship now. He taught me many things and he is an excellent guy. He will make me grow, and strong, and firm. I guess that's all...
Yours,
ME in 2012
One thing brought me back to the past... It is the photo folder of my ex.
Well, to be frank, I did not feel down or upset. However, it did make me think of how unexpected life could be. When I was with him, he was such a caring boy who made me feel like I am the luckiest girl. I had faced many emotional attacks from some people when I was with him, though most of them were false accusation. I had never did anything to "intrude" one's relationship, I had never done things to hurt her too. Those words, I chose not to listen and believed that things will be alright when time passes. Turn out, they did switch their topic for gossiping and I was safe for the moment. I just knew, I had done so many things for him, I used to have the passion to cook, bake, D.I.Y and so on. Woa.. I am kinda impressed by the photos. Couldn't believe I am such a talented girl. XD.
By the way, until now, I still do not understand how did he change so quickly. I checked the date of the photos, it was so close to the date he broke up. 19th Dec. I did not sense anything at all. Or maybe I did. I do not know really. But then, the S's group are right. (S's group is the name I gave to my old BBF's) We did not know each other enough before we started. Right, fot the 9 months, we were so sweet than not even one quarrels appear. Yet, ended up, he lost passion and leave. Our relationship was not built with a strong base. Lah! I do not know what I am trying to say. I just felt, love is never fair, it doesn't value how much you have given or how much you have sacrificed.
Now that I do not feel down about his leaving, I am able to understand what S's group said, we are not suitable for each other. He is the type of guy that love the kind of life I will not even think of trying. I love the things he doesn't like and vice versa. True, we changed for each other but it did not work out the right way sometimes. I still remembered the reason i got attracted to him is his playful nature, but in the end, I got sick, or maybe fed up by his not-serious attitude. Hah. Funny, how it goes. And, dear ME, he did not owe me anything either. During our relationship, he was giving me his best. And honestly, because of him, I gained some friendships which means so much to me now.
Again, I do not understand how God has made this happen.. I met a guy with the same name and turn out becoming someone important to me. I believe I have taken long enough to consider my decision but still, I did not know him more than I knew the one with you in 2009. By the way, God has made a perfect plan for us, and we survived many solved or unsolved problemss, and had just celebrated out 2nd Valentine's Day two months ago. Though there are some down moments, yet, in all, we enjoyed our life. It is definitely not as interesting and adventurous as you had experienced, however, admittedly, I prefer this stable ordinary relationship now. He taught me many things and he is an excellent guy. He will make me grow, and strong, and firm. I guess that's all...
Yours,
ME in 2012
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