Challenge

This semester started off quite well, the past two weeks had been quite smooth going. Anyway, today, I have my first upset moment this semester. Right now, I am so depressed that I don't even know what to do. I called home, Mum picked up the second time. I told her my clinic starts tomorrow and she was like "okay, go prepare ba" and all. But I wanna talk. I mean, why do I call home earlier than normal. Of course Sth happened. Sigh. I kept talking and Mum was like "en en en" and she did give me some words of encouragement. Then, before I managed to tell her about the weather here today, she said she is busy and ask me to call Dad if I wanna talk ltr. Sigh. When I hung up the phone, I cried. I am really upset about my performance for my clinical practice course this whole week, and am very worried that if I screw up tomorrow, I would give the impression as the worst student among the Chinese in my group. Sigh. I can't help to think if i were brother, would she continue talking? Sigh. I feel sorry for the thought, anyway. Not gonna call Dad already, don't wanna cry again. I have loads to practise and prepare for tomorrow still. Be strong! 

What happened is that...

I put lots of effort in the assessment plan, referring to senior's work, editing and doing my own plan for a few days. I sent to my supervisor, thinking it was okay already.. However, when I got it back, all I saw was yellow highlights and red lines(lots of amendments I should make) from my supervisor. I became very sad and a bit defeated. I know it's a great chance to learn, yet, it is something I have put a lot of effort in, and the outcome is like this, I couldn't help to think that I am not good enough. Sigh. Then, in the process of recovering my confident, I talked to a senior on the assessment tests I am gonna start tomorrow. She thought that I might not be able to do everything on my plan. I became upset, again. What should I do? If I do not do well in clinic again, I would be 'doomed'. "Weak student" would be my first impression for my supervisor. My grades would be low and so and so....

But, hey, guess what! You will have bigger room for improvement then! :) And means you will get extra attention from the supervisor, and thus, more to learn then! And I would be more motivated to improve and would be more dedicated and it will also boost my desire to learn. :) it may be a good thing too. :) it's better to start being weak and end up a bright character, than start off being so bright and end up a dull star. :P 

Perhaps things are not so bad. Tiff, look at the bright side of everything. Always maintain your positive and blissful spirit. :) cheer up and keep working! Good luck! God bless! 

Tiff,

Self motivating. 

Be confident and not to fear of anything! 

Love.